Wednesday 31 August 2005

Winter's Amost Here

Ahhh! The good old days! In this sweltering heat of temperatures in the 30's celsius range with the humidity, doesn't this look refreshing! Doesn't Blue look excited, frolicking in the fresh powdery snow like a puppy.

Don't worry sweeties! Soon you too will be enjoying these long sought after frigid days. Sitting firmly in the grasp of winters' loooong icy months.
In two months or so, this unbearably hot summer will be all but a distant unpleasant memory to look back and reflect upon.

Friday 26 August 2005

"You can't make up anything anymore. The world itself is a satire. All you're doing is recording it."

Art Buchwald quotes (American Journalist, b.1925)


Translation: The world is going to H-E-Double Hockey sticks in a hand basket!

Tuesday 23 August 2005

Late Night Walk

In the past few years I have decided to work on the improvement of all the different parts that make up me. Unfortunately I haven't been able to get them all whipped into shape at the same time. When I am physically fit, I am spiritually depressed and mentally derranged. When I grew closer to God, and managed to get my brain chemically stable, I grew a pot and added 15lbs. Now I'm back to square one and am trying to catch my body up with my spirit and mental capacity. This is not going as smoothly as I had hoped. First I have to realize that I am not the person who I once was.

Being the busy parent that I am, it is often quite late at night before I have been able to get out to exercise. It is not unusual to find me wandering the streets, earphones plugged into my head, at 10:00 at night. This has lead to some nervous walks, as I often hear in the news how the gangs are raging in this end of town at all hours. At least I assume it's at night, since I don't see them spray painting during the daylight hours.

Watching various diverse groups of people collecting throughout my route to socialize, was unnerving to say the least. Especially when I would come across a group that contained all young males or the odd single male walking suspiciously alone.

I started to ask myself, was I doing anything that would/could make me a target to any of these groups? Was there anything here that would cause them to swarm me? Was I just so darn sexy that I'd get hit on when walking past? Here's what I came up with. See what you think:

List of items that would make me an irrisistable target to young men along my walking route.

*I'm 40. Strawberry blonde with white highlights.
*AT LEAST 15lbs overweight (which is the equivalent to 30lbs in my doctors opinion I'm sure.)
*Hair is starting to grown on my chin....oh baby! That's hot!
*I'm wearing an extra large baggy t-shirt with dirty little handprints all over the back. Most of them are on my butt. I still don't know how or why, I have no knowlege of anyone grabbing me there, but they are there. Like crop circles. A mystery.
*I'm wearing clothes that were in fashion when I first bought them about 10 years ago. Except the new pants, which are the low waisted ones. I like this new fashion! My waistband can fall beneath my bulging waistline!
*I'm carrying the latest in technology. A walkman. Ok. It was the latest in technology when my husband bought it for me about 13 years ago.
*Orthopaedic shoes
*Control top underwear
*Acne

Ok. Maybe I was kidding about the shoes and underwear, but the rest pretty much fits. I started to realize along my walk, that I'm old. I'm old and unattractive! And I am not up to current geek standards as far as technology goes. I don't even have an ipod for goodness sakes. Everybody and their dog has one of those.

I'm getting to that age where personality matters. That means I'm going to have to start to be nice to people, even when I'm having PMS. Ewww! Looks aren't something that can get me by anymore! (Not that I ever had them in abundance to start with, but now they are becoming even more fleeting!) I'm not ready to be that nice yet!

Well, since I'm not carrying a purse, or up to date electronics, I suppose I'm safe. Unless the nursing homes up the street have let loose their 90 year old gang bangers. I may still be somewhat attractive to them, considering what they have to work with.

Oddly enough, my husband worries if my walk goes on a bit longer than expected. I don't know what he thinks might happen to me. At first I thought this sweet until I realized the true reason that he is worried is that if something happens to me he doesn't know a single thing about kids fashion. The last time I went out of town overnight I came back to find the children hadn't brushed their hair or teeth all day and were wearing mismatched clothes most of which weren't even for the correct season. He'd have to care for the kids alone. This scares him. I can tell by the look of relief when I finally walk through that door!

I sure do hope that in end times when I get my new body that it doesn't look as old as it looks now! What a way to spend eternity!

Sunday 21 August 2005

"Ah, good taste--What a dreadful thing! Taste is the enemy of creativeness."
Pablo Picasso quotes (Spanish Artist and Painter. 1881-1973)

Saturday 20 August 2005

New Look for Winter for the Whole Family

What guy wouldn't feel like alpha dog with this fabulous new creation....the winter diaper doggie hat




And every owner can be just as "cool" in this all new pull-up hat with matching diaper scarf. Get them while supplies last! We have only a limited supply of clean ones left.

"Isabelle the Diaper Head" Sung to the Sponge Bob square pants theme song

Oh...................
I went for a walk with Isabelles Mom
Isabelle, Isabelle the diaper head
We went for a coffee, for the soul it's a balm
Isabelle, Isabelle the diaper head

Her dad was there too, he rode on his bike
Isabelle, Isabelle the diaper head
His bike was gas powered, a thing we disliked!
Isabelle, Isabelle the diaper head

We drank lots of coffee, ate desserts off the floor
Isabelle, Isabelle the diaper head
We told crazy stories and then told some more
Isabelle, Isabelle the diaper head

We laughed till we cried, then finally we left
Isabelle, Isabelle the diaper head
It was cold outside, but her mom's really deft
Isabelle, Isabelle the diaper head

She used a clean diaper, a cloth one it was
Isabelle, Isabelle the diaper head
To keep her head warm, since she has only peach fuzz
Isabelle, Isabelle the diaper head

Her mom put it on well, it looked really nice
Isabelle, Isabelle the diaper head
A lovely new bonnet at such a cheap price
Isabelle, Isabelle the diaper head

And now down the street the four of us went
Isabelle, Isabelle the diaper head
It's one of the nicest evenings that I've ever spent
With Isabelle, Isabelle the diaper head

bow
exit stage left here

Friday 19 August 2005

Happy Friday

"What garlic is to food, insanity is to art"
Augustus Saint-Gaudens

Translation: You're breath stinks when you eat food with garlic in it, and you're art stinks when you're insane.

Thursday 18 August 2005

Thursday

Extended piano lesson full of laughter and fun
with a patient instructor. Meeting with a
friend for coffee and a stroll through
Westboro. Window shopping in quaint
shops along the way. Watching a
toddler explore her surround-

ings and testing her limits.
More fun. Stress melts away. RELAXATION
I love Thursday's.
Happy day.

Tuesday 9 August 2005

Find Me!

I'll just hide beside this tree
If I can't see her
Then she can't see me!

If I don't look
Then she'll go away
And that would really make my day!

Prarie Dog Tired

I used to be on the top
But now I'm on the bottom
If I had a little more energy
Maybe I would have fought 'um

Sunday 7 August 2005

A Day in the Life of Four Kids...Rolled into One

Hmmmm......
What can I do, do with my day?
I have one ahead of me
To work, sleep or play

I think I'll sleep late.
At least until 9
Then I'll get up
And on chocolate I'll dine!

My Mother won't know
As I sneak to her jar
Of dark chocolate chips
They aren't up very far

Once I am done
I'll go bother my sisters
I'll punch, poke, and spit
Till they break out in blisters

Then what should I do
Hmmm.....what to do next
I'll bug them some more
By now mom's getting vexed

Off to my cousins',
Where we like to play!
We like to use powder
Rooms have a fragrant bouquet!

Now time for more fighting
Slapping I think
Or playing with water
In the bathroom sink

Next I'll break a chair
A custom made one works best
To get the best reaction
[giggle] the parents looked stressed!

And because kids are kids
(This one was not planned)
I'll break an heirloom vase
Oh! Wasn't that just grande!

Now Mom's face is red
I think she might blow
She's about at her limit
It's soon time to go!

Now for the grand finale!
A stunt to impress!
My young cousins' daddy
Mom draws a lady with no dress

Well actually, my mom
She only drew boobs!
On the daddy's desktop
My mom's such a rube!

She used permanent black marker
She said they were eyes
And that they went through the paper
(I think they were lies)

What is that, that you say?
It's now time to leave?
You say you're embarrased?
With all we've achieved?

Out the door we go
We may not come back
Even if invited
We'll decline with some tact

Just another day
A normal one for me
I like to explore my limits
I like to be free

To do what I want
To do what pops into my head
From the first thing in the morning
Until it's finally time for bed

The very end

Thursday 4 August 2005

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KRISTA

Happy birthday toooo you
Happy birthday toooo you
You're the craziest chick I know
Happy birthday toooo you!

Love PerpetualChocoholic

Tuesday 2 August 2005

Dust Doggies


Hi all. Anyone know how to build a rabbit hutch? I just took a look under my bed again, and feel I am fighting a loosing battle. The dust bunnies breed quicker than real rabbits. I've decided I've had enough. They win. I figure if I put them in a hutch, maybe they will contain themselves to that confined space and I can pull it out every once in a while without having to clean everywhere under my bed. I actually think though that "dust bunnies" is not the proper term to use to describe what I have. I have no bunnies shedding in my house. I do however have a dog. A large yellow furry shedding dog frequenting my bedroom space. So technically speaking....I have dust doggies under my bed. I wonder if a leash might be a more appropriate choice, that being the case. Before you ask....no I am not bored, high or on any sort of mind altering drug. Medication yes. Drugs no. (Does chocolate count as a drug?)