Wednesday, 10 January 2007

Onion Brain and Sour Cream Delight

I've written a few blog entries lately. Unfortunately I've done so only in my head. I was just thinking that things will be so much easier when they find a way to hook the computer directly to my brain. I don't expect that will happen in my life time. Upon reflection, I started to wonder if this sort of device would be such a good idea after all.

My brain tends to think in layers. Kind of like an onion. For each single thought awaiting verbalization, there are always multiple thoughts simultaneously vying to be the one chosen to be expressed. Luckily, there is a little "thought traffic controller" in my head editing and choosing the most appropriate dialogue. Sometimes the forces gang up on this little fellow and over ride it, at which point I generally end up looking like a shrew or a total ass. (I don't normally like to use obscene language when blogging, but if the big ass fits....)

A friend, as well as my brother, an artist, recommended a book called "Drawing on the Right Side of Your Brain." What it said seemed to make a lot of sense to me. The only problem was that I don't think that I actually have a right side of the brain. Not that I'd ever noticed anyhow. I never visualize in pictures, feelings, etc... I believe though, I may be a wee bit hasty in this assumption!

The other day I was walking through the dairy section of the grocery store and I had the most intense desire for sour cream that I had ever had before. This was not expressed in a verbal format as left-sided thinking is, but in a gut retching desire that I could not explain. It was all I could do to pass by the sour cream without at least feeling one of the containers. Sniffing the container. Maybe a quick lick of the container would suffice? I didn't understand this strong feeling I was experiencing. I had never liked sour cream that much before.

As I passed through the sourcream aisle, I moved onto the potato chip/soft drink aisle. Then it hit me. Dip. I needed sour cream to make dip for the vegetable plate I was bringing to my brothers for Christmas dinner. Great! Now I don't just have a multiple layer onion brain talking to me in words, now my Right brain has finally kicked in, after all these years of just atrophying in my head, and finally decided to function and throw in it's two cents too!

Why wouldn't it send me a picture of vegetables with dip all arranged beautifully on a plate. Wouldn't that have been more effective? What's with wanting to slather myself in sour cream and absorb it through my every pour? Does this mean that not only is my left brain an opinionated know-it-all ass that is incorrect most of the time, now my right brain is stupid too? [sigh] Maybe hooking up directly to my brain isn't such a good idea after all.

Thank goodness I wasn't shopping for personal feminine hygiene products!

5 comments:

Adventurer said...

Mmmm chips. MMMmmm sour scream ... and I'm supposed to be off salt for another 3 weeks.

Deb said...

ROTFLOL. I just got a mental image of you licking sour cream cartons in the dairy aisle.

Kurt said...

Sounds like you need a blood test. Maybe you're low on calcium.

Sariah said...

Sour cream? Really? I would only do that to a bag of chocolate chips.

Of course, I say that now. Maybe if I got in touch with the right side of my brain I would find myself licking a jar of spaghetti sauce because my husband asked me to make lasagne for dinner sometime this week.

Mmmmm, lasagne.

GoofyJ said...

lol! I had the same image as Deb. Too funny. :)