It's a lovely day in the neighbourhood

Notice to all neighbourhood squirrels:

Please refrain from leaving squirrel nuggets on our fence. Although yes, we did spend a substantial amount of money to errect a new perch for your sitting pleasure, it was not intended to also double as a toilet. Also, please fight the urge to urinate on the bike seats, stroller tray and any other item sitting around the doorstep.

Stop begging at the back patio door for your breakfast after 8am....the kitchen is closed! If you don't get served by Mr. P. before that time, no amount of begging, chirping, twitching or flinging of squirrel nuggets will persuade me to give up the goods.


Notice to new Canadians:

We welcome you to our country, enjoy. Please however consider wearing deodourant and showering once in a while, especially before shopping at a mall. We here in Canada have lots of water. Don't worry about running out, we won't.

Also, although I am sure you were brought up to speed on the weather situation here, let me reinforce the fact that it is a colder climate than most. Sandals with bare feet are not an appropriate choice for now or during the middle of winter. Feet are especially unattractive when they are cold!

Finally, to the gentleman (and I use this term loosely!) who was pleasuring himself in front of the potato chips at the grocery store:

Maybe you could wear some underwear under your robe. Maybe some people are impressed with your "tent" making abilities....I am not one of them however. I would prefer not to have to explain to my children why "that man in the long white dress is spending so much time smiling at the barbeque potato chips. Oh, and by the way mom, what's that he's holding on to through his dress?" Also, please find a more suitable place to shake hands with your best friend. I don't need to share that.