La Merde

My 9 year old called the family in to ever so proudly show the food chain she had been working on all evening for school.  Mr. P. reminded her earlier that feces was part of the chain so she quickly added it in.  Being in French immersion, she was required to complete this task in French as she is learning Science using only French.  She used the internet as a translator for the words she didn't know.

Beside a cute little picture of a pile of poo were the following words:

le merde

Her bilingual sisters burst into hysterics and she turned red.

"But I used Google translator" she said vehemently. 


Indeed it does translate poop that way.  But were she to complete her project in English and write 'shit' we'd probably find it unacceptable.

I used Google to translate the following:

I need to go poo = J'ai besoin d'aller caca  (Google then asks "Did you mean poop?")

I need to go poop = J'ai besoin d'aller merde

I need to defecate = J'ai besoin de déféquer  (but who the heck says that!)

Another dictionary I checked shows the various ways in which merde is used.  From the innocent to the most vulgar (heavy on the most vulgar side.)

So what did I learn?

I asked my 14 year old what she says when she has to go .... merde ..... at school.  She says they just don't say that. 

Thinking about this further I realized that generally I don't tell too many people that I have to go .....well, you know.  I just quietly excuse myself for a washroom break.  Those that do like to share this kind of information with others (and you know who you are, and no, it's not Mr. P.) the level of vulgarity used is split about 50/50.

BTW....if you want to say the "shit hit the fan" it's "la merde a frappé le ventilateur"

And finally....why is shit féminine?

I haven't blogged in almost a month and when I finally do it's shit;-)